Urgh, I feel hung-over today. I haven’t felt like this in about 324 days. I’m tired, cranky, I have a headache and I have that strange feeling in the pit of my stomach letting you know something isn’t quite right. But luckily nothing is really wrong, and gratefully I’m not fighting a hangover. Nothing is wrong other than I’m tired as hell, which happens when you stay up until 3 in the morning and your alarm goes off at 6:30.

I’m too old to be staying up like that! But I had good reason – movie with a cute boy after dinner club. We made the date on Sunday afternoon after some awkward conversation… And after an impromptu group date Sunday night. My friend M, cute boy and I went to a meeting and then went to catch Chronicles of Narnia. The movie was good – I didn’t see the first one so I didn’t know the whole story – but figured out most of it. It was fun sitting next to cute boy, feeling that little rush when your legs or arms ‘accidentally’ touch. Fast-forward about 20 hours and a few text messages to confirm Monday night plans – he’s at my door.

We watched the movie Awake, which was OK. Spent most of it wondering if I should grab his hand, slide my feet under his legs or somehow make other contact. I didn’t, of course. I wanted to be a gentleman. :) I just spent most of the movie obsessing about it. The movie ended and we watched some TV. A show about ants and primates describing how they are two of the most socially advanced species within the animal kingdom. Then we watched Adult Swim and some crazy ass cartoons. OMG – they were crazy. Crass actually. I loved it.

It was a great night; he’s a cool guy. He has this quiet, sarcastic confidence that intrigues me. He has hairy arms that I find incredibly sexy. He’s nice and pleasant to be around. He doesn’t appear to have a chip on his shoulder – he doesn’t appear to hate the world – he helps others one day at a time. He kept me awake until 3:00 in the morning. I no longer kiss and tell – but let’s just say it was nice and I was able to wake up with my self-respect still intact this morning. Next, I’ll be obsessing about when I should call him. He had an early morning meeting today and I want to text saying I hope he isn’t to tired – but I won’t.

In other news, I’m grateful that a dear friend has sought out help for his addiction. I’m grateful that I was able to share a little bit of my experience, strength and hope with him, his partner and his partners kids. I’m grateful that through working a program I’ve been able to get over my self-obsessed thinking long enough to answer the phone when a friend calls in need. I’m grateful that I greet tonight at my home group. I’m grateful for a fellowship that is all around me, no matter where I go. I’m grateful for my daily reprieve, which is guaranteed only through action, constant thought of others, letting go of my will and trying to do God’s will even when I’m not exactly sure what that is.

And last but not least. I hate The Mall of America. But it did give me the opportunity to buy a new pair of underwear, have a banana and caramel crepe, see cute boys and see ‘the’ cute boy from last night. So I guess it wasn’t all bad.